Huchton Minion Arrives – but is it what it seems to be?
There’s nothing quite as cute as a new baby, right?
Maybe, but what if that baby was the offspring of an unnatural union between a human woman and an alien being?
Last week just such a baby may very well have been born to podcast novelist Starla Huchton, author of The Dreamer’s Thread.
The allegations arise after a detailed study of Huchton’s most recent confessional piece of writing, a story called “A Study in Pleasure” on Philippa Ballantine’s podcast Erotica A La Carte. Despite having changed the names of the characters involved to protect her identity, there is some fairly compelling evidence (besides the extra-terrestrial encounter) to suggest that Huchton’s baby boy is not entirely human but actually half-alien.
A quick review of Huchton’s Twitter stream in the hours after the baby’s birth reveals a series of anomalies in the child’s behaviour, some of which are downright terrifying:
1: “Kid was born in record time!”
2: “He’s incredibly quiet! Nurses having trouble agitating him enough so he’ll cry.”
3: “I wonder if his eyes ever close?”
4: “Camera flash did not make him happy.”
And, most disconcerting of all:
5: “New minion likes to snuggle a bit too much.”
This anecdotal evidence, combined with Huchton’s well-documented use of voodoo dolls to torment those closest to her, suggests that we have a serious threat of alien infiltration on our hands. If you’re in Texas you’d better start checking out the window after dark for quiet little alien babies scurrying about, hiding from bright lights and looking for snuggles. Because where there’s one, there are bound to be more.
Ozzy Out.
